Ted Nugent has a Great Recipe for Roadkill

I just came across a web-based ad for “Jeff Foxworthy’s Beef Jerky.” At first glance I thought it was the title of one of his comic routines alluding to what redneck teenagers do when they lock the bathroom door. No, it really is a food product apparently blessed by Mr. Foxworthy himself. And it comes in three different flavors!

Mr. Foxworthy has made a tidy sum poking fun at himself and others who are rooted in the Southern, pick-up truck, warm beer, exburb lifestyle. I am not convinced that his blessing will motivate me or others to run out buy his beef jerky. After all he has some “stiff” competition with Chubby Checker’s Beef Jerky (Is he still alive?) and Dale Earnhardt Jr.’s All Beef Jerky.

Jeff’s foray into food endorsements got me wondering about other strange and marvelous ways other celebrities or quasi-celebrities have tried to leverage their notoriety into food marketing. Has anyone heard of Eric Estrada’s Potato Chips or Olympia Dukakis’ Greek Salad Dressing? They used to be on the supermarket shelves. I am not sure they are anymore.

I did some googling to see what else was out there. I did find interesting celebrity cookbooks.

Richard Deacon, an actor whose comically pompous roles included Lumpy Rutherford's father in the television series ''Leave It to Beaver'' and the overbearing producer Mel Cooley in ''The Dick Van Dyke Show,'' marketed his own microwave cookbook in the early 70s. Sadly, Mr. Deacon is no longer with us. Hopefully it wasn’t caused by one his recipes.

I also found Helen Curley Brown’s “Single Girl’s Cookbook.” I never thought of Ms. Brown as a culinary giant. She was the editor of Cosmopolitan for about 100 years. She always seemed a little underweight to me if you know what I mean. I can imagine one of her tips to single girls was “when you are hungry, chew some water. When you are really hungry, go shopping for shoes.”

Dom DeLuise has a website marketing a plethora of foods related products. I guess he has a famous seasoning blend “great with poultry, meat or fish.” He’s covering all his bases. At least Dom looks like he can enjoy a good meal.

Did you know that Robert Duvall’s mother is noted to have one of the top ten best recipes for crab cakes? The secret? She uses saltines instead of breadcrumbs.

I think the most bizarre find was a cookbook authored by Vincent Price and his wife, Mary, entitled “A Treasury of Great Recipes.” I keeping thinking about all those Roger Corman horror movies he did in the 60s. I’m sure some of his favorite recipes included calf brains, sweetmeats or tripe.

Elvis Presley had two cookbooks. I’m not sure I want to make something out of either one. Here is one his midnight snacks: “Peel two bananas, add Hershey chocolate pieces, add 4 200 mg Quaaludes, mix in 2 500mg Percodan and press firmly between two slices of Wonder Bread.” I guess I would prefer John Glenn’s Muskingham Chocolate Dew Cake. At least I know I will wake up in the morning.

Good luck Jeff Foxworthy with your beef jerky. You’re in stiff competition for the celebrity-crazed consumer dollars. I do want to leave everyone with a classic-“Aunt Bee’s Mayberry Cookbook.” Here are the ingredients for Aunt Bee’s favorite pork chops:
*8 pork chops
*1 cup catsup
*1 cup Coca-Cola
* Brown Sugar to taste
How can you go wrong with pork, catsup and coke?