The New Hip-Hop GOP

Michael Steele wants to make the GOP a more relevant political organization with new hip-hop branding and a more youthful message. I have given some thought to this idea and here are ten modest suggestions to help Mike give the GOP more street “cred.”

1. Have all the remaining Republican members of the House and Senate get tattoos or visible body piercings.
2. Have Mitch McConnell host a call-in afternoon music video show on Faux News.
3. Have all the noted African American Republicans put together their own hip-hop CD. That would include Mike “in the house” Steele, Lynn Swann, Edward Brookes (Sorry, I think he is deceased), Clarence Thomas, Frederick Douglas, Condelezza Rice, Don King, Sammy Davis, Jr., and John Boehner.
4. Introduce a new political slogan, “GOP Shizzle Ma Nizzle.”
5. Appoint Shaquielle O’Neal to the next open seat in the Senate or House.
6. Keeping repeating “Supply-side Economics is off da hook.”
7. Have Rush Limbaugh give up hillbilly herion for reefer.
8. Have Newt Gingrich volunteer to be on the next MTV “Real World.”
9. Organize a major concert fashioned after Live Aid or Farm Aid to help all the displaced Wall Street financiers and investors called “Derivative Aid.”
10. Develop a public relations campaign to alter perceptions about the use of torture that is something like, “Waterboarding is a like Spring Break without the beer.” Or “Torturing terrorists is just like mosh-pitting with some guidance.”

Just a few helpful suggestions for Mr. Steele.